"My Countless gods"

     Like any other Muslim, I too, believe in one God. But little did I know that I was blessed with many more gods. How come I could have countless gods will unfold in coming lines.

     I read this post on Facebook and could not help but yell "Amazing!" All I saw was beauty in this girl but when I started reading her story I just wanted to go and hug her tight! It was like looking at my own reflection in the mirror. I have heard a lot, and by "a lot" I mean "aaaaaaa lottttttt" on being skinny. Same here, not just by my age fellows but by many people I came across. Even the most educated lots called the teachers! But this stupid body bashing took its dirty shape in university. My days at Kinnaird College and before it made me confident enough to love myself. Then I joined my university in MPhil with same spirit but eventually I got to see how hideous people can be! Not all are bad. I have found so many who love me the way I am, not for my physique but for my mind and soul.

     But then I came to realize that only bad people see badly in others. Thankfully I didn't have to wait for years to get back my confidence, I am quite stubborn in loving myself the way I am, but those couple of years were not good either. They all came with crying, pitying, doubting, whining and complaining. And the most common judgment used to be the concern of people on my marriage. Yes! That how will I get married with being such skinny, or how any guy will like me if I stay that way. For them my only purpose was to get married and give birth to a zillion babies (which is impossible in any case by the way).

     I tried from confronting to crying but nothing changed, because, I realized ugliness can never change.

     And then, as I have mentioned earlier, I am stubborn in loving myself the way I am, I see positivity in every situation, so I found out positivity in this too. I started to analyze what was wrong. There were two possibilities, either I was wrong or the other person. I took guidance from both the Islamic studies and my upbringing and came to the conclusion that I was not wrong. The fault lied in the other person pointing at my “so-called flawed body”. I can never understand what others get by bashing people. Anyway, I analyzed the whole situation and came to these conclusions:

1) I came to know that only bad people know how to criticize others.

2) Only low people will comment at such low level.

3) Family values matter and comments of people show how they are brought up.

4) No matter what, Allah is there!

5) Speak up.

6) Let bad people know that they are wrong and bad.

7) Never try to hurt others and reach their level to come back at them, let them be at their low.

8) See positivity in every situation.

9) Find yourself!

10) Stand up for other people.

11) Do not hesitate in telling your fears or insecurities.

12) Put your efforts in becoming successful.

13) Never loose your confidence for some stupid people.

14) People show their selves.

15) You do not have to react to every person.

16) Enjoy being you.

17) Find your strengths.

18) Stop anyone if they make any stupid comment about others in front of you, and last but not the least.

19) Don’t give a fuck what people think about you!

     This body shaming is not just on being skinny; so many people get ridiculed for being fat! Now, why? Girls join gyms, stop eating food and do what ever they can to shed few kilos, but for what? Because they may have been tortured in their lives. And it is not only limited to girls. Men are body shamed every now and then. And one can only imagine what harsh comments they go through. They may hide it behind the so-called tough male-exterior of them but deep inside they have been hurt in their lives.

     Many young girls go though this phase. Some people may say, so what, keep going. But not all can have a family like I have. I know how my parents brought me up, telling me the value of good soul rather than that of a beautiful body. Not all can forget all this and remain their usual sweet. Not all know how to change this negativity to their value. Not all can keep their spirits high in all such cynicism. Not all can keep all this pessimism away from their own personality.

   I always try to stand up against it where ever I can. I do not hear comments on someone’s physique. I straightforwardly tell that person to stop and think what they are saying. I know it may not create much difference but I know it will create difference, if it is in only one person’s life! So my friends stand against this stupidity and stop anyone you see commenting on some one’s physique.

     I thank all such gods of mine for liberating my thoughts and soul.

     

     To the stunning smile I know!

                                                              👊💖💖